Game Over

I woke up for the first time in this year with tears in my dark brown eyes.  The scene was familiar and while I am recalling what happened, I realized that I cried for the same reason I did eleven months ago.  My life was once again over throne by sadness. I can neither blame myself nor him, for these were all my choices. The consequence of the risk I took three months ago. I was relatively desperate to see him again and feel the gentleness of his touch. And now I was left abandoned, dumped by the person I’ve always believed to be my guardian angel. I never learned my lesson though. As I’ve said this was a replay of what had happened exactly 8 months and 20 days ago. Although this was expected, I still left myself unprepared.

I stared at my phone for a minute and it felt like forever. I got no e-mails from you. That seemed to be unsurprising. You never cared about me or how I feel about your farewell. Tears fall voluntarily from my tired eyes. Sometimes, I am curious why my eyes never run out of tears. But that didn’t matter right now for this very moment, all I was thinking about was you. It’s never a question though for I can’t even remember the last time you left my system.